cloudy like the sky today...

it has been cloudy for the whole day in Edmonton.my mood for today just like the weather, cloudy and dry...i wasn't sleeping well last night maybe is because i'm quite nervous for this morning's interview in the hospital. luckily the interview went smoothly :) since i wasn't slept well last night, i made him lack of sleep too...i feel so guilty for that. perhaps this is the main reason why i'm moody for the whole day. i shouldn't "stick" with him too much although i miss him always. it is very hard for me to distance him since it was not easy for this relationship to germinate. we're slowly building up the base of this relationship.hopefully everything goes fine :)
in today's english class, we discussed about the "mask". then i realized that actually there are many people wearing their mask in their daily life. i found it very fake and uneasy to pretend. is this the reason for them to protect themselves?? why would them do so?? maybe my heart isn't pure enough, the reason that i can think of is that they are gaining benefit from being wearing the mask. if you know something, why don't you just tell out loud?? pretending to be innocent (or know nothing) is your best way to ignore your responsibilities. you are no longer a kid, you should know that people have no responsibility to help you and he also has his own problem. people, please don't forget to show your gratitude to the people who always help you. don't get me wrong, i'm not the one who help people and hoping for reward. i dislike you for being "INNOCENT" and don't care about the things happening around you!!

感激遇到你

i don't know how to describe me feeling now.it's so sweet and i feel like i don't deserve it. the deeper i know him, the more valiant i think he is. he is such great and nice that makes me feel that i'm very "innocent"- meaning that i know very limited things compared to him. i'm just like a kid when i'm with him. however, his knowledge makes me feel very safe when i'm with him. whenever i have any problem or don't understand something, he will give me answer or if he wasn't sure about that matter, he will seek answer for me. it's too lucky to have him with me. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!:)
although i had one before, but i've never experienced being treat so right by someone who is not my bf. i just can say that i'm very lucky and appreciate everything i'm having now.hope we can have a positive progression soon:P

moody...

how to say...i really don't know how to describe my feeling now...i'm happy that he told me where he was this morning.but he did not reply me when he has reached NY.i know he is busy with his matters, so i just feel a bit upset. Anyway,just hope that everything goes smoothly for him. Today went to senior's place to have dinner,but i did not talk much in his place. Then everyone knows i'm moody. haiz....why i cannot hide all my expressions?i'm just too true and dont know how to act like nothing happen. i'm moody because i miss him...although i rarely see him,but i will online everyday,hoping that he will find me to chat...I know that's really stupid, is like waiting for something almost impossible. hmm...i'd already used to this feeling already,is just disappointment...well,nevermind,because i know that i can forget him when he is not in Edmonton anymore...at least i will try my best to forget him...at his place, i saw his work on his computer. he had wrote some sort of paperwork, for me, it looks like some journal article. it really impressed me,this is my first time to see his work. i know that he is brilliant in many fields, but this article is his hard work, he must has put a lot of efforts in it. i hope he can get a good grade from this paper. all the best for his future.